Melting Bird Mutant and Other Ponderings

So...it's the last day of the year 2007. I have spent this morning reflecting on this past year...the good and the bad! Our family has been so very blessed this year. We had great adventures camping. We saw Oak Creek Canyon, the Grand Canyon, Zion National Park, the Chiracahuas, Parker Canyon Lake, San Diego and Patagonia Lake...to name a few. Max and I travelled to Michigan for the Odyssey of the Mind competition (that would fall a good bit short of the "good" reflections list!). We added Oscar to our family (what a joy he is!) My oldest started middle school (oh, the mommy's heartbreak!) and my baby started kindegarten! I had a crazily blessed year with my photography (who knew?!) and I was blessed and humbled beyond belief through my work with both the American Child Photographers Charity Guild and Now I Lay Me Down to Sleep. My oldest sister moved to Arizona and I have had wonderful, frequent visits with her. I got to visit with all of my sisters AND my cousin to boot this spring! And we saw both my parents, and Chris' Dad and stepmother and two of his three sisters...plus both of his brothers this year. All in all it has been an awesome and exciting year. There have been some not so awesome things for sure. It has been a year of many injuries. I herniated a disc in January and that took me out of the gym for nearly two months. That was not fun. I've had to baby the stupid injury all year long. I managed to badly sprain a hip flexor...again, not fun. Oh...and let's not forget the broken toe episode! THAT one was no fun for sure! I have become increasingly convinced that my body thinks it is part bird. My arms continue to try to morph into wings, despite my constant efforts and remindings that they were most definitely NOT made to fly. That whole effort has been to no avail. My "wing-wannabes" continue to increase in flap capacity by the day it seems! In addition to my new and improved "flaps", I seem to be melting...or maybe just succumbing to some supernatural and unusually strong gravity force? There is much fluff...and spillage around my waistline. It's like the fat is just melting right over the top of my jeans and reaching for the floor. It's particularly striking with the winglets I have going on. Talk about "See it jiggle...see it wiggle..." Oh yeah. It's something to behold right now. I am now on a mission...not because it's the new year...no, this is one of those really annoying ongoing kinds of issues..but I am on a mission to tame the beast of flab. It will be NO small feat. I am afraid drastic measures are ahead. I did get a great run in this morning. 6 miles! Hooray. That was worth 900 calories according to my treadmill. One day at a time. One mile at a time. Like the commercial for SmartStart cereal...I am one mile stronger now. Well, actually, 6 miles stronger. But I was honestly ready to quit at the 5 mile mark. But I did one more. So I'm one mile stronger now. Now if I can only be one pound lighter or one inch less fluffy! Oh well. It's a new year, with new adventures and new challenges ahead. I am ready to face whatever comes. The good and the bad. I know that this is the year that we will say goodbye to Casey. At fourteen she is quickly fading. We see changes in her nearly daily now. She is holding her own, but we know her time is near. That will be sad to say goodbye to her since she has been with us since nearly the day we said "I do". I am excited about my bible study group this year. We are ten ladies strong right now and they are an AMAZING group! We have had such fun this year! We have a lot of travel on the calendar already! Chris and I are off to Hawaii in January...without kids! In March we are flying to Montana for Spring Break so Chris and the kids can ski. Then we are off to the North Rim of the Grand Canyon, Zion and Bryce National Parks the end of May. We hope to spend 4th of July back in San Diego again, and we plan to travel to Italy again (this time without kids!) in the fall! That's all that's concrete right now...but I am sure there will be a few other trips thrown in there where we can! I don't know where my photography business will go this year. I gained MANY new clients this year. More than I ever could have imagined! I am going to just hang out and see where that goes. I am definitely NOT ready to advertise. I know that for sure! I had my hands full as it was with just the referrals. I am going to definitely be more careful about scheduling...and I am enlisting a fulfillment site as well to help take the pressure off of me this year. It means prices will go up...both for sitting fees as well as prints. Not too, too much. But I am not able to keep up with all the processing AND my housework AND my kids AND my exercise. So I am going to use that to make my life easier. I guess I should give everyone a heads up on that lest they need to get things ordered before I get all of that set up and transitioned! Anyway. That's my New Year reflections...sort of. Ramblings more like! What a great year this was. How very blessed and how very, very rich.

Merry Christmas

Merry Christmas, Everyone! What a lovely day! It has been a whirlwind few days for us! We spent the 21st through the 24th camping at Carlsbad State Beach in San Diego with some dear friends. Fun, fun, fun! Pictures to come! Then we hauled it back in here to Tucson on Christmas Eve....arriving home all campfire lovely and windblown at 5:20 p.m. We managed to shower all five of us top to bottom, change into our Sunday best and attend Christmas Eve services at 6:30. I have to admit that even I was impressed at that little feat! Then Chris' parents and his brother and his wife and her niece all came over and joined us for snacks and family fun while we exchanged gifts with one another. It was nearly 11 p.m. before we had everyone to bed and the guests all on their way. Then Chris and I had another hour and a half or so of little tasks to take care of in preparation for Christmas morning. We hauled our exhausted selves into bed a little before one a.m. and snuggled down for a good nights sleep. Or so we thought. Maxwell came screaming into our bedroom at 4:30 this morning shouting his excitement over the ipod that Santa had left for him under the tree! I tried to share his enthusiasm...but told him quickly that he simply had to go back to bed immediately and stay there for another 2 or 3....or 5 hours. He headed back up the stairs. But I knew that 20 minutes later he had NOT gone back to bed as I had instructed. Afraid that they might wake the little princess at this terrible hour I head up the stairs a little before 5 a.m. and give them the "serious" talk and threat about what will happen if they wake their sister so early. I put them in the dark....shut the door...and under threat of death...put them back to bed. Or so I thought. I SPECIFICALLY told them I did not wish to see them until after 6 or 6:30 a.m...at the earliest. Yet...at 5:45 a.m. Max came back again begging to play his video game that Santa left. I figured that would be good for a solid two hours of peace and sleep...and agreed. I was just drifting back to sleep for the third time when Clara came in, all full of rejoicing that Santa had indeed come and left presents (she'd already seen them she informed us)and announced that she was ready for us ALL to go in and check out the goodies. Chris and I know better than to ignore those demand/commands and we groaned and rolled ourselves right on out of bed. Chris smacked the coffee maker on the way into the living room and we all gathered around and ooohed and aahhed over all the dazzling and intuitive gifts left by the man in the red suit. Such a good job Santa did this year. Boy...that Santa is one sharp cookie! Everyone received what they wanted and the day went off without a hitch. After all that excitement I got to walk with my dear friend Mary. We got in a good little route...though not the power route we have been walking. But that was fine because I arrived home with energy to spare. I set out to put all the new goodies into place within our household, cleaning up all the wrapping paper and running the laundry, dishwasher and vaccuum. It was a very productive afternoon! I'm going to have to leave our Christmas day at that. There's more...but I'm going to wrap this up on a positive note! It is now 8:44 and I can no longer hold my eyes open. The kids show no signs of slowdown at this point. The fact that Clara had a three hour nap is probably boosting her stamina substantially...but I myself, am pooped and have to call it a night! Merry Christmas!

14

14 years ago, today, I followed through with the biggest decision of my life and married my dear friend and love of my life, Chris. Looking back...I had only known Chris for 6 weeks when he proposed. What's funny is I had only liked him for 3 of those six weeks! Nine months to the day that we met, we were married in my hometwon church...surrounded by friends and family who loved us and wished us well. After the reception we rode away...literally, off into the sunset in a horse drawn carriage. It sounds dreamy. It was. It was magic. Now I sit here 14 years, three children, 8 addresses, 7 vehicles and 3 dogs later just reflecting on it all. Part of me said fourteen years isn't a big deal. It's the fives that matter...you know...15, 20, 25, etc. But over the last couple of years, as Chris and I have watched so many of our friends really struggle in their marriages, I have decided that fourteen is HUGE! It's huge and it's wonderful and it's an awesome accomplishment. And lest you are sitting there thinking how fortunate I am to have married someone so "perfect and easy to love", I'm going to have to bust your bubble and tell you that he is NOT always easy to love (and every now and again, I might not be the sweet dear thing you know and love either!) and it has NOT always been a smooth road for us. We have had our share of struggles and gone through some real marriage busters...but we made it. We stand on the other side now and look back at that journey and those challenges....and we are so thankful that we made it through. And that we are standing on the other side...TOGETHER. I wouldn't trade that man for any other man on the face of the earth. He has been the greatest gift that God ever gave me. I am thankful for every single minute we have spent joined in holy matrimony. Today we start our journey toward our 15th year. We're so glad to have come to the fourteenth year marker. And now it's onward! Another year. Another journey. I can't think of anyone else that I would rather have as my traveling companion on this journey called life!

"His mouth is sweetness itself; he is altogether lovely. This is my lover, this is my friend..." -Song of Songs 5:16

Max

I took these of Max this weekend at the Lake and I loved them! Had to share my baby!

Camping at Patagonia Lake State Park

This weekend our family escaped to the beautiful Patagonia Lake State Park. Just a stone's throw away from Tucson, but so very lovely and peaceful. It was a bit too exciting when we first arrived. We took the "scenic route", thanks to the GPS navigation system. We ended up having to backtrack and probably ended up adding at least an hour to our travel time. So we arrived under full darkness in a new place with NO idea where anything was. We maneuvered into a spot we thought would work okay and proceeded to open up the camper to set up camp. That's when we discovered the disaster! Our refrigerator had come open at some point en route. The floor of the camper was covered in broken eggs and a full container of French Vanilla creamer had coated the floor from one end of the camper to the other! WHAT A MESS!!! So there we are...in pitch black darkness...freezing cold, trying to use freezing cold wet rags to sop up and remove this egg concoction from the floor so we can let the poor children and two dogs (did I mention that the hounds were along for this particular road trip?!) in from the cold. Oh yeah. It was big fun. We finally got it all cleaned up and got everyone in for the night and we collapsed, exhausted, into bed. The next day dawned bright and crisp...and downright chilly. After a breakfast of bacon and eggs and pancakes, we took a boat tour of the lake...and ended up having 5 tour guides all to ourselves! So we learned a lot and saw a lot and it was a beautiful morning to be out on the water. Then we enjoyed the rest of the afternoon reading and taking long walks...and of course a few pictures! Chris took a much needed nap with Clara. Ben did some fishing, and Max and mom hiked around looking for cool stuff to take pictures of. All in all, it was a wonderful weekend. Our trip back home was without incident...and was a lot shorter too! It was a fantastic time and a place we would definitely visit again! Now we will rest up for 4 days before we head out again! Stay tuned!

Bad Dog

So...I turned around in the kitchen tonight to find Oscar standing on the kitchen island. Yep. He can jump that high. No problem. I was not amused. At all. He was just walking around up there big as a dollar...checking out all the contents there. Lucky for us...no food was up there. Still. I find his cat-like features to be a bit annoying. I've been glaring at him and calling him the bad dog that he is all night now. BAD DOG!!!! NO more counters for you!

They All Ate It!

My whole family ate this dish tonight. That's a pretty major miracle in our house! So I thought that I would share this great miracle recipe with all of you!

Penne Pasta with Spinach and Feta

1-8 oz. package penne pasta
5 large plum tomatoes, seeded and chopped
2 cups fresh spinach
4 green onions, chopped
2 tablespoons olive oil
2 teaspoons dired or 1 tablespoon chopped fresh oregano
2 teaspoons dried or 1 tablespoon chopped fresh basil
1/2 teaspoon salt
1/4 teaspoon pepper
1- 6 oz package basil and tomato crumbled feta cheese
OPTIONAL: 1 lb cooked and crumbled bacon, 1 cooked rotisserie chicken, grilled chicken breasts or chopped ham

Cook the pasta in a large dutch oven. Drain and return to dutch oven. Stir in tomatoes and the rest of the ingredients. Cook 2 minutes over medium heat or until thoroughly heated. Top with cheese. Serve immediately.

Chris likes a little meat with his dinner...so I started adding in the bacon or rotisserie chicken. I couldn't believe all kids ate this dish...liked it...asked for seconds! I figure it's worth sharing! Oh...and it's fairly heart healthy too...just for the record in case anyone else in the world is watching their cholesterol intake! Enjoy!

Enigma

e·nig·ma [uh-nig-muh]
–noun, plural -mas, -ma·ta - 1. a puzzling or inexplicable occurrence or situation:
2. a person of puzzling or contradictory character:
3. a saying, question, picture, etc., containing a hidden meaning; riddle.

—Synonyms 1. problem. See puzzle.

This is the word that my son's writing teacher used to describe Max yesterday in a most interesting telephone conversation. This conversation started out like so many others I have had concerning my two sons. It went like this..."You know Mrs. Roberts, your son is one of the very smartest in the class.....BUT..." See...there is that little word that always seems to follow the words telling me how smart my kids are. So, so smart...BUT. And so...there was the but...but this time it was more like..."Your kid is really, really smart, BUT he has an F in my class." Nice. Very, very nice. I do so love those conversations. Especially when we get down to the meat of the matter and I get to find out exactly WHY we have an F in class. Seems Max just can't seem to turn in his homework assignments. Six of them to be exact. So he has 6 big zeroes sitting there in his class average right now. Lovely. Just lovely. And so I take my dear little Max aside...careful to keep him just out of arms' reach because I really want to just THROTTLE the kid right then, and we proceed to investigate our backpack for these little missing assignments. We manage to produce three of them from the depths of his pack. And can I tell you...that backpack was just SCARY! I have never seen so much trash in one bag in my life! So on top of receiving this less than fantastic news about my flunking child, I get to rifle through this pigsty of a backpack. Needless to say, I was having a FIT! That's right F-I-T....FIT. Max and I had a bit of a conversation. Not so nice really on my end. Not nice at all. It was spelled out clearly for him. I left no illusions in his mind about his status and what it was going to take to change it. He's grounded...again. Of course, they've been grounded so long that they don't really know any difference anymore. Must think up some new and torturous punishment that will work on these boys of mine. So Max will miss Nite of Lights tonight with his dearest friend. He will be sitting home alone while the rest of us revel in the festivities of the season. I hate that...but that's the consequences of insisting on being an "enigma". Lucky me...mom to the enigma. I am praying for a transformation. From a state of enigmadom to a state of clear thinking and organization. Yes...I am fully aware that that will be a full on miracle and will require the contacting of the church to verify it's authenticity...but a miracle is exactly what it is going to take to get this child to function like the very bright kid that he is. And to move beyond the label of "enigma". Pray for the mommy! Oh...Do please pray for the mommy!

B is for....

B.U.I. I'm Blogging Under the Influence tonight. It has been a rough afternoon in the world of Tonya. Chris called this afternoon...out of the blue...with a long list of reasons we should have our dog put to sleep. Now, Casey is 14 years old as of Thanksgiving. No spring chicken by any means. Casey was a wedding present. 14 years ago...I was so very excited about marrying Chris Roberts. So very excited. But marrying Chris meant moving far away from all of my friends and family to totally foreign territory. Which I gladly did. But even though it was an exciting time...it was a sad time too, for me. And when we went to Columbus, GA over New Year's for a post-wedding reception with all of his parent's friends...Chris brought home this tiny, wriggling, fluffy, adorable yellow puppy. And that' when Casey took over our lives and stole our hearts. She was our first baby, so to speak. Been around so much longer than any of our kids. And now, suddenly...we are faced with this decision. And it is not a big obvious one. There are some signs...yes. But she is still very much with us...and the question of whether or not she is suffering...well, that one is wide open for debate. And honestly...at this moment in time...suffering does not seem to be a real issue for her. It's a lot to swallow and take in. I don't really even like thinking about it and I have been on the verge of tears most of the night now. Part of me knows it is time (or at least suspects that it is) to let her go. But part of me looks at her and says she is just fine. She's good. Not perfect...or young and spry by any means...but fine, just the same. I am struggling with this decision tonight. I have already reemed my husband for his total lack of insensitivity....ONE, by calling me on the phone about it instead of having a rational conversation with me. And TWO...for choosing just days before our anniversary to do this. Ugggh. My heart is just breaking tonight thinking of sending our Casey off. If she was obviously struggling...and I mean obviously...I would not hesitate. But she is not obviously struggling. She IS old and she IS arthritic...that is not new. But I can't get there tonight. That's pretty pathetic, I know. I consider myself to be rather gifted as far as death and dying go. I'm pretty darned good at it to tell you the truth. If you had any idea how many times I have witnessed a tiny, sweet baby being pulled off of life support...or watched them fight for and draw their last breaths...And never one tear. Not one. Yet here I have this old, decrepid, smelly dog...and I can't even imagine doing that...being there when she goes. WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME? HOW MESSED UP IS THAT???? That I would be more comfortable and more okay with watching a CHILD draw their last breath than some old stupid dog? I can't do it. I tell you...I can't do it. It breaks my heart into a million pieces and then some. And I keep seeing her look at me tonight. It's as if she knows that her very fate rests solely in my hands. And when she turns those big brown eyes to me that way...well...I just come undone. Which is where I am tonight. Totally undone. And totally sad at the thought of having to end this chapter in our lives. To say goodbye to this friend of ours. To this one that has been with me the longest.

G is for...

Golf Course. I had the very great priviledge last night of photographing a family at this totally awesome and beautiful golf course way, way, way on the other side of town. It was awesome beyond words. VERY green. Almost made me want to take up golf! I did pick out a lovely home while I was out there. Just a little abode on the hill top. Nothing a couple or three million dollars wouldn't buy! Had views of practically the whole world! AMAZING! I'm thinking I'm going to have to take some pretty spectacular pictures in my lifetime to be able to even dream about one of those houses! Anyway. Delightful evening...delightful family. They have a three year old that I just adore. She is such a little firecracker. The sweetest thing you'll ever meet. She talks a blue streak at you. Her personality has really started to shine here lately. I should rephrase that. I am certain that child has been busting with personality since day one! But she has just recently started sharing it with me! She did so fantastic (and three year olds are TOTAL wildcards...by the way. You NEVER know what they will do or how they will react.) She was charming, and sweet and cooperative. She was really working the camera for a short spell. I could take pictures of her all day long, she's just so cute and pretty. However, this child would have none of that. She gives me a very definite limit on the number of pictures that I can take and then informs me that I am all done. Yesterday was no different. She let me know more that once that we were "all done"..."I think that's enough for now" she tells me...and then she ushers us all back into the golf cart for more adventures. She was such fun to work with. The whole family was. I love their pictures. Not all of them. But a good several. I reexamined them this morning...and I still really like them. I always go back and look the next day. You get a lot of fresh new perspective that way...can see things differently after a good night's sleep and a break from staring at the images until they are burned on your eyeballs! I don't know if they will love them...but I sure do love several of them. Too many, actually. I know that it was a great night for me. A fun family, an awesome place to shoot, and a whole new experience for me. I rather liked it. A fantastic end to a fantastic day!

D is for....

Do you hear that? That loud, groaning would be the sound of defeat. Who is defeated you ask? That would be Chris. Clara is kicking his butt playing tennis on the Wii. It's pretty hysterical. Clara beats him time and again and then Chris insists on a rematch. He is so determined to win one. But somehow...as usual, Clara is our family's strongest Wii athlete by far. Look out folks...he just flipped on the ceiling fan. The man is working up a sweat trying to beat his 5 year old daughter! He was just reminding us, moments before the game started that he did, you know, used to play on the college tennis team. Fat lot of good it's doing for him tonight! Clara is just smokin him! AGain, and again, and again! After 9 matches...totally defeated, he finally admits defeat and quits. She's trying to soothe his ego now by inviting him for a match of boxing or golf. She's promising not to "beat his butt" at golf. The boys won't play baseball with her...she gets too many homeruns. She is the reigning Wii champion in our house for sure! Not sure at all how she does it. She's magic on that game system! It has made for a VERY entertaining evening, for sure!