TRAUMA

I have to say that this has been a traumatic week for me. Yep. I had to go bathing suit shopping and it really, really, really, really, REALLY sucked! I HATE to bathing suit shop and only do it when I absolutely HAVE to! I bought my last suit three years ago. And I really like it a lot and it looks decent enough. However, I have noticed here lately that if I wear it and sit in the sun, then there are several places UNDER my suit that are getting burned. So I am thinking that maybe the fabric is getting a little bit worn and/or stressed. It looks okay to me...but the water blisters on my boob kind of made me think I really need to take action on this one. So off to the mall I went. I looked...and I looked...and I looked some more. To NO avail. Bathing suits are just yucky and when I put them on they just get yuckier! I also noticed the disturbing trend of "much less costs MUCH more"! It seemed the less fabric involved in the making of the suit, the more expensive the suit was. What is UP with that? I mean...I was holding all of three square inches of material in my hand with a couple of strings hanging off of it and the price tag was OUTRAGEOUS!!! WHO designs these bathing suit contraptions anyway? So I decided I had had enough suit saga for one day and left the mall so that I could shop for this next suit of mine from the catalog in the comfort of my own home. WELL! Again...who the heck designs these things? Flipping through the catalogs was really no easier. For one...I would like to see one of these suits on a human who actually consumed some food sometime in this past month or two. I mean... how in the WORLD would I even begin to GUESS what this same suit might look like if you stretched it out and increased it's size the 10 times you would need to in order for it to fit me?! GRRRRRRR! Show me that suit on a regular lady...you know. One who has had three or four kids. And has the real life hips to show it. And the belly pooch and the back fat. THEN I might start to get a picture of what that might look like in real life on me! No such luck. And so I am sitting here tonight with my scissors and my Land's End catalog cutting out tops and bottoms of suits so that I can envision that whole mix and match package thing. Kind of like a really depressing paper dolls session...minus the fat lady of course! Alaska always starts to look more appealing to me at times like this. I bet they don't even SELL bathing suits in Alaska! Well...that's enough for now! Back to my bathing suit shopping!